we look at everything
with a sense of knowing
and then never stop to think that everything we know is wrong
we build our walls
with these biases we've made up
and speak our minds of these facts we now hold
in the highest degree
these conclusions
turn this world
fuel generations
until
we are praying to a god
that a failed poet spun
and everything that was once known true
becomes tainted with fiction
and the scientists of tomorrow
trying to prove the history of everything
are mistaken for fools
and we all are fools
in the end

make no move too sudden
or she'll run
fawn eyes
soft heart
and i die each time i break my stare
car crash
innocence gone
and all of her beauty's left blood and glass
broken bones
and my chest hollowed out to nothingness
but in that forest
she's wild
dew drops and crystal clean
fill my senses
and the cool air hits my skin
i keep breathing because i know
it's the only blanket between us

i see you
sitting beside me
awkwardly
knowing
everything
that plagues my mind
and you
brush
it
off

you see me
sitting beside you
uncomfortably
knowing
that if my look lingers too long
all my thoughts
and emotions
and dreams
will explode
killing everything
everyone
leaving us quaking in it's wake

i walk through that doorway and the air hits me like baseball bat to the gut
suffocating
my head spins back to a time when things weren't so simple
jaded
still
i swim with anger i suppress to maintain something
anything
that resembles normal
normal.
why am i reaching for the unattainable?
when did i ever care?
then the dawn breaks and i realize i've never not.
now i stare at those smiling happy people
and i wretch.

pressed against my side
i feel your breath against my breath
my heart quakes
and i'm lost in a labyrinth that is...
never going to unfold
so i'll bite my tongue
and bide my time
until i no longer die with the smile on your lips
or the sparkle in your eye
and your memory is nothing but the space between us.

if jumping ship was ever an option, i'd chain bricks to my ankles and drop anchor.

sinking through the blue/ grey/ black folds, deeper into the oblivion that is my life.

i fear and long for rock bottom.

made of these?

sweet dreams
like a drug
poison my mind
where
upon my wake
i pay the price.